10 reasons you should get to binge eat candy & drink as much wine as you want on Halloween:
1) Do you have kids? Are there kids that live near you? Do you know someone that has kids that you will have to talk to today? ALL children are spastic on Halloween. They can't believe they get to dress up and the promise of a giant bag of candy has created little gremlins. You NEED candy and wine to dull the roaring headache caused by their screaming.
2) You have to work today. It's a Monday and you are an adult...with adulting to do. Now if that doesn't crush the spirit of the little kid living deep inside you, then you are already dead. Either way, you need copious amounts of candy and wine to handle this depressing day.
3) You probably celebrated Halloween over the weekend and are now severely hung over...obviously the only way to right this wrong is more wine and candy.
4) You DIDN'T celebrate this weekend, nor do you plan to dress up or attend any festivities today. In fact you plan on pretending you are not at home while children incessantly ring your doorbell trick or treating. This depressing fact has earned you a private bowl of candy and a bottle of wine all to yourself.
5) You're partner is obnoxiously into Halloween and you have been forced to talk about/ think about/ plan your costumes while decorating your house to look like a Halloween theme park attraction. The fun unseen aspect to this is that the real cobwebs look like the fake ones you decorated with so now you live in actual filth and it isn't funny. You sooooo deserve to over indulge today just to celebrate the end of the torture.
6) You ARE the insane partner obsessed with Halloween and this is the blow out day! It is also a little sad, because your favorite holiday is over and you have to take down all the decorations...soon...soon-ish. You need to medicate with wine and candy to deal with this depressing idea.
7) You have watched far too many horror movies in lead up to today and your anxiety is sky high. Every time you blink or try to sleep, you picture a combination of horrible characters lurking under your bed or behind the door. You seriously need the wine and candy to calm the hell down!
8) You spent your pay check on the over the top costume you invented only to not win the costume contest and realize that tomorrow, that sequined bustier or killer mask you paid a small fortune for is on sale for $.99 and you have no groceries...except for the Halloween candy and left over wine from the weekend parties. There is clearly a solution for tonight's dinner and it isn't that you try to eat the mask.
9) Tomorrow is Day of the Dead! You need to prime your liver for the party tomorrow. No you are probably not going to visit the graves of those who have passed away, but you know they would want you to be warm in your cozy house and drink extra wine for them tomorrow. One has to prepare for this kind of self sacrifice.
10) You absolutely HAVE to eat candy in a manic shovel-it-in sort of a way while washing it down with gulps of wine because there are real people dressing like clowns, wielding sharp weapons and chasing people!!! Don't you watch the news? It is a scary as shit place out there these days and the combination of heavy wine mixed with the intense sugar high is just the combo needed to be relaxed enough to leave the house and alert enough to fight for your life should you encounter a psycho clown.
Halloween Pairings: Vivac Chardonnay with candy corn, Vivac Rose with red licorice, Vivac Tempranillo with peanut butter cups, Vivac Cabernet with snickers, Vivac Club Select red wine blend with milk-duds.
-Cheers from the Vivác Winery Family!
www.VivacWinery.com
Love these!
ReplyDeleteCheers to that! Thanks for reading it!
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