I Gotta Go!

(continued from "On the Road Again")

This section of our road trip through Mexico is dedicated to public bathrooms. I know what you are thinking "yay, my favorite subject!" but it is one with which special attention should be paid. I believe you can tell a lot about a place from the condition of their bathroom. Being that I am a little bit of a germaphobe, this matters a great deal to me. Now I am not a wash-my-hands-7-times-before-I-can-leave-the-bathroom kind of gal, but it seriously gets to me to touch dirty things. So with THAT in mind, I have a report on the road side bathrooms in Mexico. They are freakin beautiful! Ya, stone floors with lots of ventilation and someone constantly cleaning. Most are free to use, but some require a bit of change to pay for toilet paper. I think this should be a rule in the USA, why not hire people to maintain bathrooms by charging a few cents entry? It was such a relief since I pictured squatting behind bushes or finding myself in hot port-a-potties.  On the other hand, there was a bathroom experience that was, shall we say memorable?

*ADVISORY please stop eating if you are doing so while reading this.

As we drove onward past the lunch hour, we all grew more and more hungry, looking for just about any place to stop and grab a bite to eat. The bags of chips and junk food had hit its limit and we all needed real food. We finally stopped at a small road side restaurant and ordered nourishment. In our eagerness to get 'actual food' into our growling tummies, we over looked the greasy hot sauce bottles, the flies buzzing in a multitude that made you fear an invasion and the sticky tables. We were out of the car and going to eat. Moments passed and it became evident that my 6 year old son, Denim, had had enough, melt down was impending. Realizing he needed a nap, badly, and had not gone pee ALL DAY, I begged him to visit the restroom with me. I knew if he fell asleep he would wet his pants and we would all have to drive in a car that smelled like pee. My son hadn't gone pee all day because he is very particular about bathrooms as well, must be genetic. I should have known something was up because Denim's  tugging at my arm as we inched closer to the door leading to the bathroom increased, he is like that kid in the "6th Sense" only instead of dead people, he sees bad bathrooms. I pulled him through the door and not into a bathroom but outside! The surprise to be outside and blinded by the light was possibly a plan by this restaurant to keep you from seeing the garbage lying outside the kitchen doors that you literally had to step over to continue. Bathroom stall #1 was what nightmares are made of and I can not even begin to describe it to you, we are simply lucky that I didn't have a physiological break down then and there. Stall #2 was better...if you can imagine poop covered tissues spilling out of the garbage onto the sticky wet floor with a toilet that looked like it had vomited its contents all over itself as better. By this point I could see Denim really did have to go NOW, but he was terrified to be there. I held him against me and he took aim from a few feet away. Poor baby, I think it traumatized him.

The meal took an hour to cook and believe it or not, we did eat there. I'm not sure if it was the cold, casadilla I had, the melt down, all out, screaming fit my son threw after visiting the bathroom or the end of a long day in the car, but I didn't feel so good after that. Thank goodness we had wine packed in the car. Wine soothes the nerves and the alcohol killed all the nasty things in my belly...at least that is what I told myself.

Luckily this was a one time experience on our trip, a trip that took us into many bathrooms in the classic I've-got-Mexico-tummy-issues way. However the state of Zacatecas had areas of road side that reminded me of that restaurant and there is no cure for the sights your eyes take in, no amount of wine to sooth them away, so we had to turn to tequila.

(to be continued...)

-Cheers from the Vivác Winery Family!
www.vivacwinery.com