When you are really in love, even the mundane stuff is fun. That's how I knew Running and I had slipped into that comfortable spot in our relationship.
I eagerly stepped onto my home treadmill and happily started my run...while facing a wall. Ya, I was going to run on a treadmill facing a blank wall. This is what most people think of as Hell, but I actually didn't mind. I focused on my body and worked on my stride. I felt the muscles work and made adjustments to my body for better form. That's when I felt that prickle up my spine, that feeling that something was off. There was an obvious favoring of my right leg. I could feel my left leg compensating. Why, Running? Why are you acting like this?
Sometimes it is when you are the most comfortable that a relationship can turn on you. I'm not sure why Running wanted to hurt me, it seemed as if it came out of nowhere! I let my shock take over and as if on autopilot, I decided I'd ignore the elephant in the room. That never works by-the-way, it just makes things awkward, and now things were awkward with Running.
Even my favorite running path couldn't cover up the awkwardness in our relationship. Now it wasn't just a matter of looking the other way, hoping Running's bad mood would pass. Now it was turning into an issue. At this point it would have been a good idea to be upfront with Running, find out what was wrong. I did not go that route. I decided to give Running some time off, some alone time. As the days ticked by, I found myself thinking about Running all the time...was Running thinking about me too?
3 days later and no word from Running (what a jerk right?), I still had this unresolved issue that Running left me with, it was starting to take over everything I did, and Running couldn't care less! At this point I was getting mad, and I don't behave very well when I am hurt and mad. So the next time I passed by the treadmill...I flipped it off. Yep, I seriously know how to get under the skin of inanimate objects.
Then I felt bad. You know how you feel after being lame to your partner when you are fighting and then you give in and apologize even though it was clearly their fault in the 1st place? You know a 'guilt apology'. Well after flipping off the treadmill, I decided to grow up and take the initiative with Running.
I decided another treadmill-facing-a-blank-wall date was in order, an easy date that I could duck out of easily if Running was still mad at me. I started to unfold the treadmill and it pinched my finger badly! Evidently it had not appreciated my clever finger salute. While this was a clear sign I was venturing down a scary path, I ignored the signs and proceeded.
A short date later, it was clear...Running and I had some issues. I decided to come clean and be direct. Ask the questions that scared me the most. What I found out was revolutionary. Running wasn't mad at me, in fact we were in love more than before, but my baggage had come between us again.
We have decided to get a professional involved, couples therapy, someone who can help me stop self sabotaging with heavy heel strikes or upper body twisting. Some relationships are worth fighting for and for me, Running might be True Love.
*Today's blog is brought to you by Vivác's Cabernet Sauvignon, because as with great relationships, this wine always comes through for you.
-Cheers from the Vivác Winery Family!
www.VivacWinery.com
